Why You Should Forgive

Human relationships can sometimes be a complex affair. Much as we depend on and need each other; much as we are meant to be each others’ support system and be each others’ keeper on this earthly journey, these relationships that we hold so dearly sometimes do get complicated, however much we try to hold them together, however much we would like to look the other way and pretend things are okay, there are times when the pressure simply gets to us and we find ourselves letting it out on others, or in other cases, other people letting it out on us.
Human conflicts are not new, they date from way back. They date from as early as the existence of the first man, several scriptures and pre-historic texts can attest to this fact. And as long as life exists on this planet, conflicts among humans and animals as well will continue to exist.
Having established that conflicts will remain with us for as long as we exist; and having established that we need to co-exist in harmony for the sake of our personal and collective goals, it is important that we find a way of working around conflicts (those that we have committed as well as impending ones) so that they don’t become a hindrance in attaining our set goals. One such way is forgiveness.
Forgiveness can be defined as the internal act of letting go of thoughts and feelings of resentment, bitterness, anger, and the need for retribution and vengeance toward someone who we believe has wronged us, including ourselves. Forgiving others not only plays an effective role in boosting human relationships, there are scientific sources which state that the pure act of forgiveness can cure us of chronic pains and ailments, because when we truly forgive, we clear blocked energy channels responsible for poor health and undesirable outcomes in our lives. Holding on to past hurts and pains only hurts us some more, keeps us bitter and stuck in the past, and stops us from experiencing the here and now and from living from a place of love, joy, and abundance. When you are in angry state due to past transgressions, your creative machinery is jammed and thus inhibited from living the life you truly deserve and desire.
It is therefore recommended that we forgive quickly and we forgive often, because true forgiveness is not meant for the other party much as it is meant for us; this is to say that when we forgive our transgressors, we become the first to benefit from this process. The act of forgiveness also applies to ourselves; many are the times when we fall prey to our own decisions, mistakes, and misdeeds. The mistake that most people make after realizing that they faltered in one way or another is to beat themselves up over and again, they incessantly criticize themselves as if they are meant to be absolutely perfect; my advice to such people would be simple; if a friend or a loved one made a costly mistake and came to you for comfort, what would you tell them, I am sure you would use gentle and comforting words to help them feel better won’t you? Well, why won’t you use the same gentle and caring words towards yourself? A little self-love won’t hurt would it? Extending a forgiving heart towards ourselves is just as important as extending a forgiving heart towards others. It is futile and fatal to hate or continuously condemn ourselves for our mistakes. It is helpful and realistic to think of our mistakes in terms of what we did or did not do, rather than in terms of what the mistakes made us. You make mistakes; mistakes don’t make you-anything, always remember that. Forgive yourself as quickly and as often as you forgive others.

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